


There is no Going Back

by loveatfirstsight



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Assassin!Levi, Gore, M/M, Slow Build, ereri, future dark kinks, future smut, riren - Freeform, student!eren, yandere!eren (sort of...idk)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-14
Updated: 2014-10-22
Packaged: 2018-02-13 02:38:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2133972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loveatfirstsight/pseuds/loveatfirstsight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The closest Levi gets to people is when he has a blade at their neck. A professional killer for a hidden branch of the government, "Wings", Levi lives a solitary life with only death to look forward to. Raised by a murderer, Levi only knows the cold of steel weapons and the cold of numbed feelings that have always helped him survive. He gets a call from the commander of his organization to kidnap and secure a mere highschooler, who turns out to be the key to eliminating the threat of the infamous organized crime syndicates Titans. Levi becomes a guardian and teacher to the kid, and Eren becomes the feelings Levi thought he could never have.</p><p>(You must get my permission to copy or duplicate.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Goodnight

**Author's Note:**

> I am sort of blindly writing this fic, so don't expect quick updates haha. I've been dying to write a bad ass Levi and a sweet(and sarcastic) kryptonite Eren for a long time. Here goes nothing ~

 

 

 

 

 

Sound does not exist when my knife slips across the fleshy column of a target’s throat, when my corpse pale finger hugs a sharp cold trigger that sends a metal messenger of death straight through the head of my prey. I don’t even hear a beating pulse in my ears to remind me that I am human. My fear was murdered long before I lost all of my baby teeth.

Killing is a filthy business, the way they beg for their lives with rivers of sticky tears and snot dripping off their chins , the nose twitching stench that comes with them pissing and shitting themselves, and the transparent lies they tell thinking they have a second of mercy. They all make such silly faces, wide eyes with blown up pupils, shivering grimaces that nearly look like smiles, but they don’t deserve any sympathy.They certainly don’t get any from me.

I get rid of the scum of the earth, I am the man the government sends when they want a certain someone to stop breathing or to get the pig to cough up information. Even if it means making she or he cough up a couple bloody teeth, or lose a couple fingernails. I get the job done. I work for the organization “Wings”, a shady branch of the government that deals with the ugliest and most vicious side of politics. We are the sinister trick under the FBI’s sleeve, we are the men and women who do not have families, we are the men and women who have only talent to our names. The talent to kill. So when Erwin, the Commander of our perilous little organization, asks me to fucking save someone, I make sure to whole heartedly bitch at him.

"Blondie I don’t do saving, where the hell am I supposed to take the target afterwards? My fucking apartment?" I berate him while sitting on my sleek black leather couch, my phone on speakerphone on the seat besides me as I roll my white long sleeve up to re-attend to a couple flesh wounds on my arm I got from the night before. I’m expecting Erwin to sigh like he’s already bored and done with my shit but his voice is rigid and full of utmost seriousness when he rebukes,

"Yes, you can and you will. I cannot tell you everything right now, but this assignment might be our biggest break on the Titans. We will need to take him into custody first, decide on whether the leads we have been given are true, and what his motives are." I stop rubbing antibiotics on the slight dagger wound above my right elbow and grit my teeth. 

Titans is an organized crime corporation that has been rising in the country, their name conceived from the Greek mythology giants that scared even the gods. They are grizzly and unorthodox, they leave their victims mutilated beyond recognition, and have their slimy hands in deals of drug trade and many other dark illegal transactions. But the most threatening factor of the group is that the brains behind their organization have created a new drug, ‘Shifter.’ It has rumored to turn its users into inhuman murder machines, giving them inhuman and terrifying capabilities. But before the drug could be widely dispersed ‘Wings’ ambushed their not so hidden laboratory. Unfortunately, Titans got a tip we would be raiding that day, and they were able to destroy all evidence of the drug and how it was made.

I fucking hate the Titans.

"Okay. I trust in your judgment Erwin.” I lean over and click the end button on my phone, no need for flowery goodbyes with him and I. Erwin can take a joke but he doesn't like to screw around and waste time either, he cuts to the chase. I respect that. 

I begin to lay a fresh bandage over my minor injury and once I press it down I unroll my sleeve with a sigh. It doesn't hurt but it'd be a pain in the ass if it got infected or even worse: bled through one of my pristinely washed shirts. In my line of work you have to be quick and clean, if you leave any kind of trace you can say hello to a bullet to the face or a charming knife to the back. Being immaculate is no problem with me, being more than sanitary is a habit that crept onto me like a disease from very early on in my life. It is a constant need for self preservation.

I reach forward to the coffee table in front of me and snatch the beige folder Hanji, the lab geek and researcher of my tiny secure squad, gave to me this morning when she did one of her morning & tea business visits. She gives me the info for my assignment and then gives me the latest gossip about our squad and case. The crazy goggled brunette is probably my only friend, not that I wanted our strange companionship to happen, but it did. She's sort of like a benign tumor that attached itself to me, harmless, but nerve racking to have. 

Friends and family are just deaths waiting to happen. So, it helps my sanity to keep people at a calculated distance.

My eyes scan the pages tucked in the folder, my thumbs flipping each page, and my casual glances at data pause distinctly on who the subject of the matter is.

Eren Jaeger / Age: 18 / Eye Color: Green / Hair color: Brown / Height: 5'8

A kid? Fucking fantastic, I get to add 'kidnapper' to my friendly resume. I stack the papers accordingly and place them back in the folder on the table, then walk over to the large stretch of window I have that overlooks the urban landscape. The city is bathed in a piss yellow tint, the sun begins to set over the horizon, and I begin my ritual.

I ceremoniously take off my shirt and pants, folding them neatly on the arm of my couch. Leaving me shirtless and in my favorably tight black boxer briefs. I crack my neck to the left and right, then start my usual workout. 500 push ups, 500 sit ups, 500 lunges, today I feel a little more agitated than usual so I add an extra 100 pull ups on the built- in bar I have above my bedroom door to blow some steam. 

When I finish I pick up my folded clothes and set them in the laundry hamper, then grab a bottle of misty cold bottled water from my steely refrigerator and down it in one satisfying gulp. I like my grey-scale small apartment, it's minimalist and up to my nearly impossibly high standards of spotlessness. It has the bare essentials, so if needed I can just grab a couple bags and leave and never come back. 

After I take a shower set at a temperature that Satan would approve of, I begin to prepare my kill case. Which is a basic black case stashed with a R700 sniper (paired with a silencer) dislocated into two pieces for storage purposes, two of my favorite suppressed M9 handguns, ropes, duct- tape, blades, cleaning wipes, first-aid, and needles ready to make even an 8 ft tall motherfucker pass out. My outfit: all black, turtleneck, leather gloves, tight/stretchy pants, and leather loafers that have soft soles to mute my presence. I part my sharp bangs slightly to the right, brushing it out with a comb thoroughly, then run a hand through my undercut while going over tonight's plan.

My mission is to sneak in the dead of the night, 3:30 A.M. to be precise, and take the kid drooling on his pillow. Should be easy since he will be home alone since his sister is staying over at some friend's place. It's urgent to stay low because not only is it in a fucking Mr. Rogers white picket fence neighborhood, apparently I might not be the only one who is after Jaeger tonight. This high school brat is soon going to have a very rude awakening. 

* * *

 

 

I pull up a couple blocks away from the cozy little suburban gingerbread house in my black Honda Accord. Its essential that I have a fast car but I have to stay incognito so I can't be shaking my ass around in a Ferrari or anything like that. Although my car looks relatively normal, it certainly isn't. Black rims, tinted windows, and the sucker is bullet proof. 

I've studied the blue prints on the one story house so I decide to enter from the back yard, there's a window there I can unlock easily and enter his room without a hitch. But first I have to go through a bunch of other people's back yards, making sure to avoid tripping over garden gnomes and ripping my pants on bitchy thorned bushes, I get there in one piece. 

What the hell is so special about this twerp. I checked his background and he has average if anything a little below average grades. No special talents, except for detentions for disorderly conduct AKA getting into pointless school brawls. I get my lock pick tools and unlatch the back window, sliding it ever so slowly so the kid doesn't shit the bed hearing a pterodactyl screeching window sound.

As I pull myself up and get my right and then left leg on the bedroom carpet, I scan the bedroom for the target and find a brunette softly snoring on his back with his head turned to the side. The kid seems to at least have exceptional facial features from what I can see here in the shadows. His thick short brown lashes fluttering from REM, button nose, tussled chestnut bed head hair & bangs, and golden smooth skin by the looks of it. Tch, pretty boy. As for his room, classic rock posters plastered everywhere on the walls, unwashed clothes littering the ground, a small T.V. and an array of videogame consoles at the foot of the television. Typical teenager.

Creaking sound. Hallway. My senses sharpen, my eyes and ears honing in on visuals and noises. The bedroom door is closed so I sneak over adjacent to the door and put my back to the wall, dropping my brief case ever so quietly on the carpet. I stashed a couple blades on my body and a handgun tucked in my belt. I get myself poised to strike, choosing a butterfly knife for sound control, and my jaw clenches, eyes widen, pupils shrink, I know there's a sonuvabitch there just waiting to choke on my blade.

The door begins to slightly ease open, I wait, a darkly clothed man sticks a leg in the room, I wait, the side of his head comes into plain view, about to turn to look at me. I sweep his leading foot and numbnuts falls over backwards, his back making an unfortunate loud thud on the ground. I straddle the fucker before he can shit a brick and press my knife to his neck, I watch the flicker of confusion and terror storm in his eyes, then I stab him right below his adam's apple.

I get up quickly so none of the squirting fountain of blood mars my complexion. Slitting a throat makes too much of a damn mess, a quick devastating puncture leaves the enemy just as gurgling and dead but lessens the crimson fireworks to follow. 

Quick tapping of foot soles heading my direction from hallway. I don't have enough time to conceal myself besides the door as a woman in dark apparel with a handgun sprints towards me, she shoots at me like a complete brain-dead rookie. Great, I can already hear the kid behind me jolt up in his creaky mattress. 

I dodge the bullet, and duck under her armed outstretched hand, twisting her wrist from underneath, breaking her wrist, then I disarm her. Her gun flies over my shoulder and fucking hell, I have to get rid of the attacker before the teeny bopper gets a hold of the weapon. 

"W-WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?" Jaeger screams annoyingly, can't you see we are trying to kill each other Einstein? I dodge a punch to the nose and a kick to the groin, I whip my butterfly knife around to intimidate her with the glittering show of my blade. She lunges forward and dodges my stabbing attempts, grabbing onto my knife, blood drips down her palm as we struggle further into the boy's bedroom. 

Click of a gun. Both of our heads turn to the lethal source.

"LISTEN UP MOTHERFUCKERS. IF YOU DON'T EXPLAIN TO ME WHY YOU ARE HERE I'M GOING TO SHOOT BOTH OF YOU!" Jaeger is standing in front of his bed in a baggy white T-shirt and plaid pajama pants, teeth clamped and bared, his finger doesn't quiver on the gun trigger...interesting... This is a good distraction, I drop my hold on my knife and slam my left hand's knuckles into the woman's chest plate. The wind is knocked out of her and I can feel her bones crackle beneath the force of my punch, she writhes on the ground in agony, I subsequently take a handkerchief out of my back pocket and begin to wipe the bitch's blood off of my right hand. 

"WHO ARE YOU? WHY ARE YOU HERE?" Yeah yeah, you think you are Mr. Bigdick because you have a gun in your hands. I blink up at him after doing a brief wipe down of my hand, and I enjoy the look of raw fury and bewilderment on the brat's face. I start to bend down to pick up my blade, but to my surprise the kid fucking shoots at the ground in the direction I was headed towards.

"ANSWER ME!" I wasn't expecting that. Well, the kid has guts I'll give him that. I slowly unbend myself and stand upright, casting him a bored unimpressed stare. Here I thought I'd be able to explain his situation when he was tied up and gagged, I wouldn't have to deal with noisy back talk, what a pain this has been.

"I'm here to save your ass,  _Eren  Jaeger_ _._ " 

He goes owl-eyed at my knowledge of his name and the sentiment I just shared, he sputters,

"H-how do you know my name?" His eyes then zero in on me with a determined furrowed brow, " And how do I know you are telling the truth?" 

I roll my eyes and bitterly retort with my eyes squinting at him in condescension, "Trust me kid," I begin to take slow casual steps towards the boy shivering from nerves, "If I wanted you dead, you'd already be on a hot date with the reaper by now." I stop walking till I'm face to face with him, my hand slithering over his grip on the gun. I look up at him with my head tilted to the side and I'm briefly peeved at the fact that the highschooler is taller than me. My explanation is low and placid,

"We need to leave now before anymore of those scumbags come. Plus, I'm sure your neighbors have already called the cops on account of you assclowns shooting your guns everywhere." 

Jaeger gazes down at me, entranced or paralyzed by my feral glare.I take the opportunity to rapidly jab my index fingers into a pressure point in the crook of his elbow with my other hand, his release on the weapon weakens as he yelps, and I slip the gun out of his hand into mine. Before Jaeger can babble out any more questions or threats I make the tip of the gun kiss his forehead and he freezes. I pull a needle out of my pocket and let the gleaming tip sink into his jugular, his startled deer-in-the-headlights eyes begin to drowsily close, his scowl fading into a medicated peace, I hush a whisper menacingly at his ear,

  
" _Goodnight. _ "


	2. Sunsets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, just had to get the story more settled in but next chapter the story will really pick up. The somewhat domestic-life of an assassin and a senior in high school begins...? (sweet jesus) Anyways, thank you for reading, drop a comment if you have any questions or whatever~

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As Eren slumps against my shoulder I'm a bit surprised at how light he is for someone of his height. Then I let him rest against the bottom of the bed upright with his head to the side like an abandoned puppet. I pick up my knife from the ground and almost clean it with my handkerchief, until little miss sunshine (whom I'd somewhat forgot about) starts heaving for oxygen in a loud obnoxious way. I sigh and walk up behind her so that when I crouch down its behind her head, I don't want her playing possum and kicking my balls or any of that shit so this way I steer clear from anymore disturbances. 

I lick my lips, mouth parted as I look the woman in the eyes, empty brown wells of shit , and press my dirty knife to her vein protruding strained  throat. My left hand grabs a fistful of her hair and I take a look at the back of her neck before I make a red mess, and there it is. The signature Titan tattoo of a slash mark against the back of the neck. And by tattoo I mean a scar tattoo, it’s a whole part of the initiation. These noodledicks actually take a blade and cut into their flesh to show their 'undying loyalty' to the organization. Not cute little papercuts either, they take a slice out of the back of their neck like fishermen, nice dents in their scars. If you ask me, it just shows their undying stupidity.

With the confirmation that these fuckers are Titans, I drop the scum's head and glare down at her, her teeth bared like a rat, and my knife returns to its place. No way a novice like this (who would shoot a gun immediately in these circumstances) would know anything useful, must have been the other shit-cake that knew anything worth torturing for. I get creative this time, I lift my knife and stab her straight through her right eye ball deep enough to pierce her small brain. Her legs jitter around for a second but then she goes stiff like a proper corpse. 

I get up and absentmindedly wipe down my blade with my handkerchief, staring at sleeping beauty against the bed. Time to get this troublesome kid's ass to Erwin so I can get a nice cup of black tea ASAP back at head quarters before sunrise. Erwin always gets the good shit because he knows I can tell the difference between leaf piss and quality tea. 

* * *

We stand behind a wall of see-through glass, the interrogation kind, staring at this kid chained up in a chair, his foggy drugged up green eyes blinking open at us. God these things always take so fucking long, I cross my arms and lean back against the wall impatiently, I haven't had the chance to clean my apartment thoroughly in a while, I stare at the exit door with a sigh. But of course we've got to play good cop bad cop, Erwin with that lawful good conviction thing he has going on and me... I smack them around verbally or physically if I have to, as long as we get the job done. 

Eren scrunches his face up like a hamster looking out from its cage, looking at Erwin first then at me, of course I don't give him the satisfaction of my recognition as I notice this all through my peripheral vision instead of looking at him dead-on. Erwin sits down in a chair facing the boy, then he finally starts,

"Eren Jaeger, we meet under these special circumstances because not only is your life in danger, you may have information the government needs. I'm Erwin Smith and this is my associate Levi." Erwin gestures an eloquent hand over in my direction, I respond by actually taking a look at the P.O.I (person of interest). His eyes are wild as he pulls at his chains pathetically, he reminds me of a zoo animal squirming in its confinement. Erwin goes on,

" Your father was involved with the Titans, he helped create an illegal and incredibly hazardous drug called 'shifter.' Were you aware of any of this before or after he disappeared?" Erwin intertwines his fingers and rests his chin on the bridge of his hands, boring his all- seeing sky blues into the suspect. Eren leans over and looks straight into Erwin's scrutiny with a fiery counter,

"I don't know shit about what my dad has done, other than the fact that he's the reason my - my Mom got killed! I was only 8 when that motherfucker left us, if I knew anything I would tell you but I haven't heard or see him in ten years, not even after what the Titans did....to my mom..." Eren's sales pitch seems believable, the hesitation that came to recalling his mother's murder, and the visible teeth baring hatred he shows for his father. Erwin nods his head in a well concocted manner of showing his sympathy, but then continues,

"Well then, I'll cut to the chase. Two days ago you were jumped by a group of thugs walking home from school, we have surveillance footage from a nearby pharmacy that you showed sudden capabilities only someone who has injected 'shifter' can have. Explain this." 

Eren stares down at his hands, to anyone else he could be looking at the dirt under neath his fingernails, but I know better. He can still see the leftovers of lives muddied on his hands, 

"I... I don't remember... I thought I was going to die and then... everything goes blank..." His eyebrows scrunch together at his failure to comprehend his situation. I roll my eyes and start in on him,

"Pretty convenient excuse, too convenient. Have you also magically forgotten how you were injected with shifter too? Now properly answer Erwin, scumbag." Eren starts shaking his head furiously, grasping at his messy brown hair and grunting in what seems to be pain or panic , probably both . Erwin seems to buy it all though, silencing me with a look and then that resonating yet soothing voice of his,

"Levi." He glances at me but then hones his attention on the kid and asks, " If what you say is true Eren, then will you help us? You might be the key to us understanding not only the drug but how to end the organization that murdered your mother and many other innocent victims." A shiver ripples through Eren, at first I think he's going to start getting all weepy on us, but something much more... interesting happens instead. His pupils contract into a sharp and psychotic gaze, I notice a brilliant frenzied shade of green burning in his skull, a smile that yearns for vengeful homicide stretched out on his now deranged features, 

"I'll help you kill every last one of them."

* * *

I fall asleep in a chair in the lobby waiting for Eren to be finished with some brief examinations and being further informed with the fact that he won't be able to go to school, see his family or friends, and will be stuck with me for an unfortunate while. I wake up to the slam of a door and my lips smack together a few times as I take in the sight of Eren being escorted by some associates of mine. Petra the redhead who has a talent for breaking bones, Auruo who is an expert in poisoning, Gunther who is an ace with snipers, and  Erd who likes to choke his prey with whatever he can get his hands on.A creative bunch whom I've worked with on quite a couple occasions.

Eren is more or less a rabbit being taken by a pack of wolves, Auruo and his shifty squinting eyes fall on me and he rushes to report,

"We will tag along behind you while you take Eren to your apartment, just in case one of those Titan bastard--!" He bites his tongue (like he always does ) before he can continue to bore me with details. I just nod and turn around, very much ready to get home and take a shower. The car ride is silent, at one point when we are at a stop-light Eren slowly turns his head in a not at all conspicuous way to peek at me and I stare at him make an ass-hat of himself unaffectedly. When he realizes I've been watching him try to secretly look at me the whole time he snaps his head back and stares straight forward, a visible gulp bobbing in his throat. Sweet dicks this guy's an idiot.

When the coast seems clear Auruo and the other agents disperse and I'm left alone with the teenager staggering into my apartment. I hiss at him,

"Shoes off at the door shit-stick." Eren nods hurriedly and hops on a leg to get a shoe off, then ends up falling on his ass in the whole humiliating process. I sigh annoyedly through my nose as I lock the door, I wonder if I'm going to have to potty train him too. I begin my mini speech,

" Here's what's going to be happening. You do not make a mess. I sleep in my bedroom, you sleep on the couch. You clean up after yourself, you do. not. make. a. fucking. mess. Any back talk about the chores or demands I give you and I serve your ass on a platter with potatoes on the side. The T.V. volume never goes higher than 75 and you will have no access to any phones or the internet. Most importantly you do not even think of leaving this apartment. Understood ?" I tilt my head to the side with a hand on my hip, making sure to have a do-not-fuck-with-me glare to seal the deal. I see Eren's mouth instinctively protest to the whole 'no phones or internet' on his tan troubled pretty face but he intelligently decides against it by clamping his lips shut. He hoarsely replies,

"Yes sir."

He seems to have a mix of fear and respect for me, that'll do. He slowly walks in, taking it all in, I go over and make my way to my bathroom, more than ready to scrub away at the built up grime on my skin. But then I hear a loud gasp from the living room and I rush over with my pocket knife poised and ready to be thrown into someone's liver but I ease to a stop when I see him in front of the wide wall of a window overlooking the city.

I put my knife back into my pocket before he can turn around and look at me with an impressed and shocked expression,

"The view is amazing. And holy shit look at that sunset ." I blink at him twice, thinking about why I have to have such a dweeb under my custody, and then glance over at the carrot orange sky. I've gotten used to the sight, but this kid has only seen the fences and sidewalk dog- shit of the suburbs so he's probably not used to things like this. I shrug and point at the T.V. remote on the arm rest of the couch,

"You can watch T.V." Eren's lips pinch in a sort of embarrassed uncomfortable-ness, as I begin to turn around I am once-a-fucking-again stopped with a hesitant,

"Um... do you have any food? I haven't eaten anything today and I'm kind of starving." Jesus this brat  is dramatic. He should try 3 days without food, lost in a forest with nothing but a knife and pocket lint. I sigh as I make my way over to the refrigerator and open up the freezer, microwavable food neatly stacked, and slide out insta-fettucini to place on the kitchen counter. Eren nods in approval at my food choice and pinches his lips again, a question burning in his mind.

"Spit it out kid, you'll get constipated holding shit in like that." I put the cardboard dinner in the microwave and set it to the required 2 minutes. I look back at him as he rubs his shoulder with a hand nervously and asks,

"Do you think the Titans will go after my friends and family? Mr. Smith said that they would be protected but..."

I would have expected him to ask if he himself was going to be in any great danger, teenagers are supposed to be selfish little fucks right? But it seems this guy is a bit different than others, much more intense than any other regular teen or adult I've seen. I should try to calm him down though, I notice his hands are at his sides now in fists.

"The more you cooperate with us the sooner we can take out the Titans. I can't tell you if they will be okay or not. But you shouldn't worry about things you can't do anything about, waste of time and energy." Eren stares at me, still in his pajamas, and there's a sort of gleam in his eyes that I can't quite figure out. The microwave chimes and I get his food out and onto a plate, grab a glass from the cup cabinet and fill it with water from the refrigerator dispenser. He doesn't say anything as I set his food on the living room table in front of the couch and put his glass of water on a coaster. I then arch an eyebrow at him in an 'anything else asshole?' sort of way. He pipes up in a guilty and grateful manner,

"Thank you sir!"   


 I nod my head once and then I turn around to finally get back into my bathroom to shed my sticky clothes off. A strange uneasiness coils around my body like a snake, the kid's awed face flashes in my head again as I step into the marble shower. I remember a similar face, same exuberance, same bright with life expression. But I let the filth and memories wash down the shower-drain as I turn the knob in front of me for a hotter water temperature. 

 

Just how long am I going to have him here?

**Author's Note:**

> You can reach me through my blog l-e-v-i-ackerman.tumblr.com. I'll be tracking fic: TinGB and my username, l-e-v-i-ackerman. Thank you for reading ~


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